Posts Tagged ‘family travel’

Traveling With Teenagers – Debunking the Myths
Tuesday, January 19th, 2016

We’re currently on the road traveling the world with our teenagers, Ian (19) and Lily (16) and tackling the myths out there about why you wouldn’t want to travel with your darling, albeit sassy and sarcastic, teenage children.  Last month we debunked family travel myth #1 – you have to be rich to travel with your family. And this month we are taking on the rocky road of the teenager/parent relationship!

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Lily and Ian – teens traveling the world with their parents.

One thing that thoroughly astounded us when we told people about this trip, was how many people asked us if we were taking the kids with us.  Why would we possibly leave them at home as opposed to sharing all of the wondrous sights, landscapes, food and culture with them!?!?!  I can’t imagine this trip without them!  I can’t decide if this question comes from parents not wanting to hang out with their teens or the perception that teens don’t want to hang out with their parents, but either way, I am calling complete BS on it.

In tackling  family travel myth #2 – Teenagers don’t want to leave their friends and their social lives behind to travel with their parents – I thought it might be nice to interview the kids about their thoughts and feelings about the trip and family travel, in general, and share their perspectives with you.

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Visting Taj Mahal

What did you think when I first proposed the idea of traveling around the world?

Ian:  It was a crazy idea, but I just kinda went along with it.

Lily: At first I didn’t think it would actually happen and then after that I thought you had lost your ever-lovin’ mind.

At what point in the planning process did you start to get excited about the trip?

Ian: Like a month before we left was when I just got to the point where this was really happening and we were actually leaving.

Lily: Maybe six months. That’s when it started to feel real.

What were your biggest concerns about the trip before we left?  Why?

Ian: Money because we didn’t know if we would have enough money to go as long as we wanted.

Lily: School. Just being able to get stuff done on the road.  In terms of the trip, I was worried about how we were going to carry all of the stuff we were taking.

What did your friends think about the trip?

Ian: They all thought it was cool, but they were concerned about how we would spend so much time together without wanting to kill each other.

Lily: Some people were baffled by it, but my friends were supportive and their biggest concern was what they were going to do for a year without me there.

What have you learned about your family from this trip?

Ian: I was surprised that mom and Lily did so well on the mountain and made it through to the end.  I learned that they were tougher than I thought they were.

Lily: We’re badass.  We’ve gone through some really stressful moments, I feel like we have pulled through it as a family and I’m not sure we would have been able to pull through it without each other like if it was just me and Ian.

What is your least favorite part of traveling as a family?

Ian: There’s a lot of stuff that we get worked up about that we don’t need to.  Like getting visas.  We’ve gotten better since Turkey, but there’s still stuff that seems ridiculous to worry about that we still do.  (He means mom here.)

Lily:  I don’t have my own space, it’s our space and that means I have to clean up after myself more.

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What is your favorite part about traveling together as a family?

Ian:  That we don’t have to see these places alone – these cool, amazing things that we are seeing.

Lily: That our relationships with each other have gotten healthier because our lives don’t seem so separate so our stresses don’t seem so separate and that pulls us together more.

What advice would you give to teenagers about traveling with their parents?

Ian: It’s not as bad as you think it is going to be.  It’s not going to be terrible to be hanging out with your parents.  It will be what you make it so if you think you are going to have a terrible time you will and if you think that it will be a good time, then you will.

Lily:  You are not going to be independent when traveling with your parents no matter how much you think you are.  There are going to be things that happen that you are just going to want to hold your parent’s hand and you need to be ok with that.  The people you travel with are what makes the experience unique.  If you traveled with other people, you would have completely different experiences and memories.

What advice would you give to parents thinking about taking this kind of trip with their teenagers?

Ian:  Let your kids be part of the planning process and involve them as much as possible in making decisions.

Lily: Save surprises for your kids.  Don’t let them look up everything you will see online so that they can have the experience of seeing things for the first time.  Also, don’t expect them to click into it right away.  Don’t try to force them to like everything, let them experience it in their own way.

What has been your favorite experience and why?

Ian: Petting tigers in Thailand.  It was really cool to see them up close and learn about how they aren’t declawed and just being able to be in the cages with them and watch them play.

Lily:  The cooking school in Chiang Mai because I really like to cook, but I know limited stuff so it was fun to learn new things to cook and succeed at it.

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Lily and Ian at cooking school

What do you miss from home?

Ian: The level of social interaction at home like going out to dinner with friends and going to game night.  I didn’t expect that to be as hard as it has been sometimes.

Lily:  I miss knowing what to buy in the grocery store.  Like the whole milk debacle in Turkey.  We bought milk three times and never got the right kind of milk!!

How do you think this trip has influenced you?

Ian:  It has made me want to travel more and not just stay in one place.

Lily: I am more resilient than I thought I was and I like traveling, but I miss the comforts of home.  I never thought that would be something that resonated so strongly with me.  I mean sometimes people just need some hot chocolate or a freaking brownie or anything else that reminds them of home.

Next time we’ll take a look at family travel myth #3 – I’ll have to home school my kids if we take them on extended travel!  I know. The thought made me want to drink, too.  I mean, there is just no way I am going to succeed at homeschooling my kids in Chemistry or Calculus.  There is no end to the tears and frustration in that scenario.  And the kids would probably be upset too.  Never fear, my friends, there are other options!!

 

About Staci Schwarz

staciStaci and her family are currently traveling the world for several months enjoying good food, incredible sites and the best of company. You can follow their madness on www.blameitonmywildheart.com or on Facebook at Blame My Wild Heart.

Next month Staci will explore family travel myth #2 by interviewing her children to assure you that they were actually totally excited about this trip and are not being held hostage by their super mean parents who tore them away from their friends to go on a stupid trip around the world.

 

 

 

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Traveling the World With Teenagers
Monday, December 7th, 2015

family travel

Loving the family adventure in Cappadocia, Turkey

Nine weeks ago we left our home to travel the world for several months with our two teenage children – Ian 19 and Lily 16. During the four year planning and saving process, we came across many different opinions about our decision to undertake such an adventure ranging from fascination to jealousy to disdain, but what surprised us the most was how many people responded with reasons why they could never take a trip like this. The “I would love to do that, but…” responses were varied and perplexing to us. If we could do it, surely ANYONE could, right? And so, we developed this series of articles to tackle what we call the “myths” of family travel – all of those reasons why you “can’t” take a trip like ours are about to go right down the drain. Here we go!!

FAMILY TRAVEL MYTH #1

You have to sell your house and all of your belongings or be loaded with cash to undertake a round the world trip.

That would be FALSE, my friends!

This idea first came about several years ago when I read a book called “One Year Off” by David Elliot Cohen. It tells the story of two parents who take their three children on a one year trip around the globe. It was mesmerizing and inspirational and at once I decided we needed to do it.

But here is the thing – we had less than $1000 in savings. We were renting our home. How could we ever come up with the capital to undertake a journey like that?!? And that was the pivotal moment. We could have defeated ourselves right there and moved on to the next seemingly unattainable dream. Or we could get real about what we wanted to teach our kids about big dreams and how to go about making them happen. And so we came up with a plan to cut back on our spending and start saving with an end goal of 9 months abroad.

We did all of the standard things that people do – we cut back on eating out, family vacations and movies. Instead we cooked at home, took weekend getaways and watched Netflix. We sold all of the junk in the house and garage that we weren’t using anymore and stopped buying stuff we didn’t need. At one point in time, all three of our cars didn’t total $10,000 in value because we refused to take on a car payment.

WHEN PLANS GO AWRY:

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This is what the kids look like all loaded up with their bags on our travel days.

We had hoped it would take us three years to save the money we needed and that because we were renting month by month, we could just terminate our lease and hit the road. And then the unthinkable happened. The perfect little house fell into our laps. It was “just right” for our family in a fairytale kind of way and we fell in love with it immediately, but the clincher was the price. It was CHEAP. And there was no way we would ever be able to find a home we loved as much in the price range we were looking at. I said no. NO NO NO. And my husband, who clearly knows me far too well, took me by the hand and said “I can see growing old with you here”. And so we bought a house.
Now we had to decide if we were going to rent it out while we were gone. We were hoping for 9 months away, but our plan had always been to travel until the money runs out and then come home and that is NOT conducive to renting out a home. And so we had to figure a mortgage and basic utility costs into our budget. And three years turned into four.

YOU DID WHAT?!?!?

We knew pretty early on that in addition to cutting back and building our savings that we would also be taking some of our retirement money to pay for this trip. It kinda cracks me up how freaked out people get about this. It was a no-brainer for us. First of all, we are young. We have 27 years left to work and can quickly recover those funds. Secondly, we beefed up our contributions when we decided to take the trip so that we were padding those accounts and getting the most out of our employer contributions. And most of all, it was more important to us to use that money now to travel with our kids than to wait until we are retired and travel without them. The future is not guaranteed and there is no telling if either of us will even be in any condition physically to travel at all in 25 years. Why risk it? Why miss out on the opportunity of a lifetime to spend this amazing time with our kids exploring the world? Why indeed!! We are 42 years old. My husband’s mother died unexpectedly at the age of 47. Her death is like a bright star in the night sky reminding us to live in the moment and not take for granted that the future will be what we expect it to be.

We were an unlikely family to take a trip such as this. We had little in savings and no equity when we made the decision to chase this dream. Many of our family and friends thought it would never happen. And yet, here we are, in Thailand, having the time of our lives. I love proving people wrong!

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At the Red Fort in Delhi, India.

But the bottom line is this – if we can get our nonsense together and save the money to take this adventure, then you can, your best friend can, your co-workers can and that weird neighbor down the road can. It’s a choice you make every moment of every day to prioritize the dream. I can have the Starbucks or I can pay for a meal in Thailand. I can buy these concert tickets or I can pay for a week’s lodging in Cambodia. Every time you chose the dream, you are that much closer to attaining it. It really is just that simple.

About Staci Schwarz

staciStaci and her family are currently traveling the world for several months enjoying good food, incredible sites and the best of company. You can follow their madness on www.blameitonmywildheart.com or on Facebook at Blame My Wild Heart.

Next month Staci will explore family travel myth #2 by interviewing her children to assure you that they were actually totally excited about this trip and are not being held hostage by their super mean parents who tore them away from their friends to go on a stupid trip around the world.

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Photo Friday: Florence, Italy
Friday, November 30th, 2012

Today’s Photo Friday comes from yet another family on the road! Facebook fan Anthony Graziano submitted this shot with his family taken in Florence, Italy – 104 days into their career break. You can read more about their travels on their blog, Over the Hills and Far Away.

Have you taken a career break with your family? We’d love to hear about it!

Want to see your photo here?

Check out our easy submission policy!

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Around the World as a Family
Monday, October 22nd, 2012

Most folks travel in their twenties when they have few responsibilities or in their retirement when they have fulfilled them. We thought we’d try splitting the difference.  As a family we value experiences — learning by doing — which is why we chose an alternative school for our children that used the Expeditionary Learning (ELOB) approach. Our concept for our around-the-world (RTW) trip emerged primarily from that core value.  We talked a lot about whether we wanted to travel in between school years, or take the kids out of school for the whole year. This decision was made a bit easier by the fact that Anne is a teacher, and we can home school the kids for the year without major impacts to their overall school journey.

The timing of our trip is no accident – it’s based entirely on Alex and Leah. The 2012-2013 school year is 5th grade for Leah and 7th grade for Alex, and we wanted to avoid them missing a transition year if possible. Middle school in Seattle is 6th-8th grades, so Alex will miss the middle year of middle school. Leah will skip her last year of elementary school, but will hopefully return to join Alex at the same middle school. Additionally, the kids are old enough to carry their own luggage and fully participate in our adventures, but not full-blown teens yet.

Making it Work

We have come to understand that the key to a successful family experience is acknowledging that it takes four individuals working together. Our kids may be ten and twelve, but they are still part of Team Van Loen! This trip is not a Disney cruise and we have never billed it as such. Our journey is not FOR them, it is WITH them. As with any team, we have our different strengths, weaknesses, styles, and priorities — so honest communication, compromise, and flexibility are essential. It only takes one cranky person (adult or child) to impose misery on the group and it is impossible for everyone to be perfectly content all the time.

Memory is a funny thing as well. A few weeks ago we took the kids on a hike to the ruins above Cusco. Both kids complained about how hot/tired/hungry/thirsty they were for what seemed like the entire time (my memory). Yet, yesterday when asked what his favorite activities had been, Alex listed that hike as “awesome.”  Ignoring crankiness is clearly an important skill that I’m still learning. The other advantage of spending so much time together is that we have the unique opportunity to become tuned in to each others state of mind/body and multiple opportunities to practice navigation.

Planning successful experiences with kids requires more thought than for an individual or couple simply because there are more factors involved.  Rushing is an especially bad idea as is the lack of a “plan B” and snacks. Our kids want to stop to watch animals, get ice cream, walk on walls, play in fountains and smell the flowers – so outings tend to take longer. They can handle one museum, not four – so we pace ourselves. In our experience, time and low stress are the real keys to family happiness.

How Children Enrich the Travel Experience 

Kids are are naturally  present in moment. They ask really good questions and are remarkably keen observers. Our children make us think and see things from a different viewpoint. Soaking up the experience comes easily to them and is joyful to observe. Having our kids with us opens doors and makes us approachable. As a family we have found that we get a more friendly treatment than traditional tourists. Locals seem more patient with us and willing to initiate conversations about our shared experiences as parents.

What do We Hope to Learn by Traveling as a Family?

For us it’s not really about the travel itself – but the shift and shared memories that make it worthwhile. We wanted the kind of shared experiences that require a complete exit from our ordinary life. Living in new places with different people, cultures, and expectations will hopefully sharpen our perspective of ourselves and deepen our understanding of others.

 

The Van Loen family left their “normal” life in July 2012 to start a career-break and slow-travel the world. They will be volunteering, exploring, and learning throughout Peru, Chile, New Zealand, Australia, Singapore, Thailand, Cambodia, China, and finally taking the Trans-Mongolian railroad across Russia. They will be homeschooling their kids while they travel, with the goal of expanding their horizons and changing their perspectives. You can read about their travels on anvl.travellerspoint.com, follow Van Loen Adventures on Facebook or follow the family on Twitter as @anvltrip.

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Photo Friday: Cusco, Peru
Friday, August 3rd, 2012

Today’s Photo Friday submission comes from Facebook fans, the Van Loen family;

“Our kids get some up-close and personal time with a llama at Tambomachay, Cusco, Perú. We’re now 3 weeks into a 13 month RTW career-break, and are loving it!“

Follow along with the Van Loens as they travel through South America, New Zealand, Australia, Singapore, Southeast Asia and China. You can find them on Twitter or on their website, http://anvl.org.

Want to see your photo here?

Check out our easy submission policy!

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